Suck Your Stomach In and Put Some Color On!

What Southern Mamas Tell Their Daughters that the Rest of Y'all Should Know Too

Author: Shellie Rushing Tomlinson

Publisher: Penguin

ISBN: 9781440635434

Category: Self-Help

Page: 304

View: 7778

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The host of All Things Southern shares the sass and strength of Southern mamas in this spunky guide to life. In this humorous handbook, Shellie Rushing Tomlinson, host of All Things Southern, reveals the all-important lessons Southern Mamas teach their daughters. Readers will discover why blue eye shadow is trashy and learn to interpret regional dialect like the Southern Mama APB, a bulletin translated on Southern streets as: ?Give your heart to Jesus, girl, because your butt is all mine!? Shellie carefully breaks down the teachings behind those famous manners and social graces through her firsthand observations and dry wit. Here?s everything you need to know from how to cope with the unexpected, compete in the Mr. Right Game Show, and raise children?to how to keep that marriage knot tied tight over time. Woven with quotes from real Southern Mamas and sprinkled with recipes and other Southern secrets, this book?s a bona-fide celebration of all things south of the Mason-Dixon Line.

What Southern Women Know (That Every Woman Should)

Timeless Secrets to Get Everything you Want in Love, Life, and Work

Author: Ronda Rich

Publisher: Penguin

ISBN: 1101078251

Category: Social Science

Page: 240

View: 7481

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A Southern Belle Primer meets The Rules in this engaging volume that explains the mystique of Southern women and why they always get what they want, and shows women how to get the same kind of romantic, professional, and personal success.

When Did White Trash Become the New Normal?

A Southern Lady Asks the Impertinent Question

Author: Charlotte Hays

Publisher: Regnery Publishing

ISBN: 1621571602

Category: Humor

Page: 256

View: 4221

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Tattoos. Unwed pregnancy. Giving up on shaving…showering…and employment. These used to be signatures of a trashy individual. Now they’re the new norm. What happened to etiquette, hygiene, and self restraint? Charlotte Hays, Southern gentlewoman extraordinaire, takes a humorous look at the spread of white trash culture to all levels of American society.

Conferring

The Keystone of Reader's Workshop

Author: Patrick A. Allen

Publisher: Stenhouse Publishers

ISBN: 1571107681

Category: Education

Page: 216

View: 4576

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In this book, Patrick Allen maintains that the benefits of conferring are worth the effort of learning to do it well. He sets out to reveal how teachers can overcome their perceived obstacles and make tangible the somewhat intangible aspect of conferring with readers.--[book cover]

Some Day You'll Thank Me for This

The Official Southern Ladies' Guide to Being a "Perfect" Mother

Author: Gayden Metcalfe

Publisher: Hachette Books

ISBN: 1401395724

Category: Family & Relationships

Page: 256

View: 4503

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A hilarious guide to that incomparable creature--the Southern mother. Southern society is arranged along matriarchal lines, since the Southern matriarch is a far more formidable being than the much nicer Southern male. She has to be this way; she was put on earth with a sacred mission: to drum good manners and the proper religion--ancestor worship--into the next generation. In Some Day You'll Thank Me for This, Gayden Metcalfe and Charlotte Hays, bestselling authors of Being Dead Is No Excuse and Somebody's Going to Die If Lily Beth Doesn't Catch That Bouquet, deliver up a hilarious treatise--complete with appropriate recipes from those finicky, demanding moms--on the joys, trials, and tribulations of being the daughter of a Southern mother. Including sections such as A Crown in Heaven (a Southern mother's favorite fashion accessory), Grande Dames, Toasting the Southern Mother, and why grandmothers prefer their "precious angel baby" grandchildren to their own "bad" children, this is the perfect gift for any Southern mother--or daughter of one.

Talk Southern to Me

Stories & Sayings to Accent Your Life

Author: Julia Fowler

Publisher: Gibbs Smith

ISBN: 1423648978

Category: Humor

Page: 168

View: 3413

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The hilarious book that the South’s very own Dolly Parton described as “fun, informative, and oh-so Southern,” Talk Southern To Me is a love letter to the South, y’all. Essays ’bout charm, beauty and style, chewin’ the fat, love, parenting, and more—full of yes ma’ams and no sirs, casseroles and cheese balls, taffeta and pom-poms . . . plus more Southern phrases than you can shake a stick at. If you’re not from the South, bless your heart, pay attention cause there’s a ton of wisdom to be found in these heartfelt, humorous ways. Southerners speak their own unique version of the English language, and you’ll come to understand it in these pages. It’s a linguistic art. And it’s gooder than grits, y’all. South Carolina native, Julia Fowler, is the creator of YouTube’s Southern Women Channel, home of the viral video series, Sh%t Southern Women Say. She is an actor, writer, and producer who has worked in television, film, and on Broadway. She currently resides in Venice Beach, California, and is generally irritated that it’s void of proper fried okra. Visit her at www.southernwomenchannel.com.

What Southern Women Know about Flirting

The Fine Art of Social, Courtship, and Seductive Flirting to Get the Best Things in Life

Author: Sam Martin,Ronda Rich

Publisher: Penguin

ISBN: 9780399532528

Category: Self-Help

Page: 224

View: 409

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Explains how to take advantage of one's natural female instincts to achieve success on any occasion, with advice on how to master the art of social, courtship, and romantic flirting, and be both a good storyteller and listener.

A Southern Belle Primer

Or Why Paris Hilton Will Never Be a Kappa Kappa Gamma

Author: Maryln Schwartz

Publisher: Broadway

ISBN: 9780767925273

Category: Humor

Page: 134

View: 6806

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A humorous study of a uniquely American phenomenon examines the mystique of the Southern belle, discussing family trees, silver patterns, the fashion calendar, and famous belles. Reprint. 15,000 first printing.

Out of the Dust

Author: Karen Hesse

Publisher: Scholastic Inc.

ISBN: 0545517125

Category: Juvenile Fiction

Page: 240

View: 4616

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Acclaimed author Karen Hesse's Newbery Medal-winning novel-in-verse explores the life of fourteen-year-old Billie Jo growing up in the dust bowls of Oklahoma.

Sue Ellen's Girl Ain't Fat, She Just Weighs Heavy

The Belle of All Things Southern Dishes on Men, Money, and Not Losing Your Midli fe Mind

Author: Shellie Rushing Tomlinson

Publisher: Penguin

ISBN: 1101514698

Category: Humor

Page: 336

View: 941

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The bestselling author of Suck Your Stomach In & Put Some Color On! returns with more helpful how-to's and keen observations from Dixie. Guided by principles from the ancient Belle Doctrine, the host of radio and television's All Things Southern offers down-home advice on everything from health and fitness-managing thy caloric calculations without going Straight Running Crazy and surviving the Raging Inferno Syndrome (aka hot flashes)-to the Southern art of handling your man (Bubba Whispering). Whether giving business tips or debunking the Big Boned Theory, making political observations or celebrating the inevitable resurgence of big hair, Shellie is an adviser women can relate to and laugh with regardless of their age or which side of the Mason-Dixon they call home.

Swag

Southern Women Aging Gracefully

Author: Melinda Rainey Thompson

Publisher: John F. Blair, Publisher

ISBN: 0895875411

Category:

Page: N.A

View: 7771

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Ranging from swimsuit shopping to squirrel battling, from magnolia theft to cemetery etiquette, Melinda Rainey Thompson's delightful essays reflect the everyday peculiarities of life in the south.

The Southern Belle's Handbook

Sissy LeBlanc's Rules to Live By

Author: Loraine Despres

Publisher: Harper Collins

ISBN: 0062036343

Category: Humor

Page: 96

View: 5691

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Learn how to navigate life with the effortless savior faire of a true daughter of the South with The Southern Belle's Handbook. Sissy LeBlanc's rules to live by will teach you how to hook, hold on to, and handle any man as well as conquer any personal situation with the poise and confidence of a sophisticated southern stunner. And because every woman possesses her own sassy instincts, you can also record your own rules for unstoppable fabulousness and success.

Heart Wide Open

Trading Mundane Faith for an Exuberant Life with Jesus

Author: Shellie Rushing Tomlinson

Publisher: WaterBrook

ISBN: 0307731944

Category: Religion

Page: 224

View: 1127

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You believe in God. You’re trying to serve Him. But do you know how to truly love Him—and let Him love you? As a Bible-believing churchgoer, author Shellie Tomlinson harbored a secret in her good-girl heart. She longed for something more than routine faith; she wanted to love God with a genuine, all-consuming passion. So she got honest with Him: “I admit it. I don’t love you like I should, but I want to love you. Help me!” In Heart Wide Open, Shellie invites you to answer the call of your restless heart and refuse to settle for anything less than the intimate friendship of God. Through her heartfelt and honest words, you’ll find practical inspiration to help you… · exchange your “just enough Jesus” mindset for an all-out pursuit of Him · put sizzle in your Bible study by asking God to show you the wonder of His Word · trade formulaic devotions for a devoted life Are you ready to stop struggling to make time for God and instead live every moment with God? Discover how to live with your heart wide open.

The Glass Castle

A Memoir

Author: Jeannette Walls

Publisher: Simon and Schuster

ISBN: 1439156964

Category: Biography & Autobiography

Page: 288

View: 6724

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The child of an alcoholic father and an eccentric artist mother discusses her family's nomadic upbringing, during which she and her siblings fended for themselves while their parents outmaneuvered bill collectors and the authorities.

Secrets of the Southern Belle

How to Be Nice, Work Hard, Look Pretty, Have Fun, and Never Have an Off Moment

Author: Phaedra Parks

Publisher: Simon and Schuster

ISBN: 1476715459

Category: Biography & Autobiography

Page: 258

View: 1178

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The breakout star of "The Real Housewives of Atlanta" advises women on fashion, etiquette, dating, and the workplace, giving a modern twist to traditional Southern values.

Saints in Limbo

Author: River Jordan

Publisher: Waterbrook Press

ISBN: 0307446700

Category: Fiction

Page: 345

View: 8531

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Longing for purpose in life after her husband's death, lonely widow Velma True receives a mysterious gift from a stranger--one that brings her memories to life--and as secrets old and new come to light, Velma is able to overcome fears of the past and feel her way toward freedom. Original.

The Art of Southern Charm

Author: Patricia Altschul,Deborah Davis

Publisher: Diversion Books

ISBN: 1682308340

Category: Biography & Autobiography

Page: 224

View: 3845

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Patricia Altschul, the surprise breakout star of Bravo’s hit reality show Southern Charm, introduces an essential lifestyle guide as refreshing and fun as a gin martini. “Patricia on #SouthernCharm, like lookin’ in the damn mirror. Cheers queen.” —Lady Gaga Fan-favorite Bravolebrity Patricia Altschul from the primetime show Southern Charm finally brings fans her eagerly anticipated opus on etiquette and living a glamorous Southern lifestyle. Patricia provides advice on every situation, from hosting a memorable cocktail party, to decoding the dress code for any event, to handling a drunken boor at the dinner table, to delivering the perfectly phrased insult—like her now iconic “shameless strumpet.” The Art of Southern Charm takes readers inside the world of Charleston’s most captivating grande dame, who (with Michael the Butler) offers a blueblood’s blueprint for curating and celebrating life at its best.

The Book of Bunny Suicides

Author: Andy Riley

Publisher: Hodder

ISBN: 1444709135

Category: Humor

Page: 96

View: 7646

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Wickedly ingenious and surreal ideas for all the little fluffy rabbits in this world who just don't want to live anymore, with bonus material from Andy Riley's sketchbook.

Being Dead Is No Excuse

The Official Southern Ladies Guide to Hosting the Perfect Funeral

Author: Gayden Metcalfe,Charlotte Hays

Publisher: Hachette Books

ISBN: 1401305741

Category: Cooking

Page: 272

View: 3530

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Folks in the Delta have a strong sense of community, and being dead is no impediment to belonging to it. Down South, they don't forget you when you've up and died--in fact, they visit you more often. But there are quintessential rules and rituals for kicking the bucket tastefully. Having a flawless funeral is one of them. In this deliciously entertaining slice of Southern life (and death), inveterate hostess Gayden Metcalfe explains everything you need to know to host an authentic Southern funeral. Can you be properly buried without tomato aspic? Who prepares tastier funeral fare, the Episcopal ladies or the Methodist ladies? And what does one do when a family gets three sheets to the wind and eats the entire feast the night before a funeral? Each chapter includes a delicious, tried-and-true Southern recipe, critical if you plan to die tastefully any time soon. Pickled Shrimp, Aunt Hebe's Coconut Cake, and the ubiquitous Bing Cherry Salad with Coca-Cola are among the many dishes guaranteed to make the next funeral the most satisfying one yet. Even if you've never been south of Rochester, this book will charm, it will entertain, and it will give you all the ingredients required for the perfect Southern send-off.